Seriously, why did everyone love GOTG so much? It followed every cliche ever. It was an okay movie, not great.
1. Avengers: Age of Ultron
Obviously. Watch the final trailer if you haven't already.
...This is the Thumbnail?
The first movie made the Avengers look invincible by making an invading alien army their bitch. This is a problem as it makes the heroes hard to root for. Also, movie LAW says the 2nd movie in a trilogy must be the darkest (except for The Lord of the Rings because Peter Jackson is terrible at pacing), and every Avengers trailer has made Ultron a very intimidating threat. Who voices him by the way? JAMES SPADER?!?! That's so fucking rad!
So what other threat could make The Avengers look like the underdogs? AI of course. CALL ME A SCI-FI NERD but humanity has been fighting robots for so goddamn long...(in movies)...I think Asimo is ready to file a harassment suit.
I think it's a toss up between this and #4 on this list for "which movie will make more money". It doesn't really matter who wins though. Both movies are owned by Disney.
2. Mad Max: Fury Road.
I love really like the Mad Max series. Granted, I haven't seen a Mad Max movie in about a decade, but I'm actually excited for this reboot. It's a funny thing to write too, since I am well known on my previous blog for being really skeptical...of every...reboot...that even gets announced. Reboots that are better than the original are very rare. (2012's Dredd is a good example of the exception. Than again, the Stallone Judge Dredd movie set a very low bar to hurdle).
However, this reboot is being made by the same director and writer of the original. If anybody can re-work art AND have it be good, it should be the original artist. Oh, and the movie uses very little CGI. Almost every stunt is done with practical effects which CALL ME A HIPSTER, alwayyyyys looks better on high budget movies. I mean come on, look at this shit.
Mel Gibson is a fuckhole
Okay. That storm near the end of the trailer is obviously CGI but the car wrecks and explosions are real. And they look amazing, since this is shot in the desert, and unlike a comic book movie, doesn't need to destroy a city.
3. Crimson Peak.
Not gonna lie, I love Guillermo Del Toro. He makes movies for the fun of it. The Hellboy movies are stupid but very entertaining and make narrative sense. Pacific Rim is REALLY stupid, VERY entertaining and DOESN'T make narrative sense (why isn't Mako the main protagonist?). But there is the hipster in me that wonders why he doesn't make another Pan's Labyrinth only as a full blown horror film.
Luckily, we get his "ultimate masterpiece" that has been in and out of development for 10 years or so.
Spoiler alert: I bet "Crimson Peak" is a fancy term for "Blood Mountain".
I hope this movie does what people THINK it might do, which is reboot the entire stagnant horror genre. GDT is also involved in one of the most anticipated horror video games with Silent Hills. That is a lot to put on one guy and hopefully his vision can make a great movie and great video game. My senses say it will be a mediocre movie and an awful video game because Hideo Kojima may have been fired from Konami. That's like Microsoft firing Bill Gates or Reese's Peanut Butter Cups firing Mr Peanut.
If this movie re-invents the horror genre, I will be surprised. CALL ME A PESSIMIST, but out of any movie on this list, this is the one I'm the most curious about. It's different. It's unique. It's an original goddamn screenplay. And holy shit, does the horror genre need an entire reset more than any other, except for maybe Rom-Coms.
4. Star Wars: The Force Awakens.
I don't talk about it much but I used to be a HUGE Star Wars nerd. I still want a Stormtrooper costume (contact me on Twitter if you have a free one). I had books, comics, toys, and the video games holy shit, the first Star Wars: Dark Forces is one of my favorite games....in like the 30's range (also, Battlefront).
So it should go as no surprise that I flipped my shit on this trailer.
WHEN THE MILLENNIUM FALCON PEW PEW'S AND I'M ALL LIKE YYYYYEAH PEW PEW BLAMMO. GET SOME YOU DARK SIDE FUCKS!
I don't even care.
I don't even care about your opinion of me.
I want this movie to be so good my eyes are blown through the back of my skull.
I don't even care. I don't even care about your Jar-Jar attitude right now. I want this movie to blow every other movie out of the water with tactical nuclear strikes. I don't even care.
Also, George Lucas did such a terrible job with the prequels that this movie might be good just by association alone. I expect the 2nd Star Wars movie to be dark as shit, just like my favorite Star Wars movie, The Empire Strikes Back. So...Avengers: Age of Ultron might be the better movie, but fuck it, I wanna see this one more.
CALL ME A STAR WARS NUTJOB! I will take it as a compliment.
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