The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt Review

Note: This is a big game so this is a big review.

The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt is the first open world RPG I've loved playing.  It is fantastic.  Every issue I have with open world games is addressed and while maybe not solved, has laid a foundation that I hope future open world RPG's will improve upon.  THIS is how you do an open world RPG.

For those that don't know, in the Witcher 3, you play Geralt of Rivia, a Witcher aka monster hunter.  Geralt's sorta wife Yennifer (it's complicated) leaves a note saying you need to contact her.  Once you do, you learn Geralt's protege and surrogate daughter Cirilla (Ciri) is alive, has reappeared and is on the run from the Wild Hunt.  The Wild Hunt are elves from another world who want Ciri because she is the child of the Elder Blood and has the power to manipulate space and time.  To complicate matters more, she is the real daughter of the emperor of Nilfgaard and rightful heir to the throne.  Emperor Emhyr is trying to conquer all of the northern realms because of course he is since you don't get Charles Dance to voice act a nice guy.

When you look like this, of course you're gonna take over the world.

Much of the game's main story is about tracking down Ciri and it works sooooo well for an open world game.  It is easy to pace as it sort of works like a detective story where you need to hunt down leads and talk to various people who have seen her.  While this is a minor spoiler that most people interested in the game probably already know, you actually get to play as Ciri when you meet somebody who tells Geralt the story of how they ran into her.  It's a cool way to tell her story in a more complete way rather than having to just follow along to dialogue.  Also, there are times when those leads end up being red herrings, end up needing to look for a person who knows a person who knows a person who saw Ciri, or....the trail goes almost completely cold.  There is even one point where her trail goes so cold that, without spoiling anything, Geralt has to take a big gamble on a barely noticed side character.

Ciri, however, is very noticeable though.  Everyone remembers her vividly.  

The pacing isn't perfect, but it does allow for side questing without breaking the narrative.  There are times when Ciri has a near miss with the Wild Hunt that demand urgency or times when a main quest character says, "hurry back" as if Geralt is a lunatic for going off and doing something else.  But it's a step in the right direction though and the game's presentation encourages this with secondary quests that have as much narrative as the main quest and at times.....OH MY GOD, actually relate to one another!!!!

The secondary quests mostly revolve around allies met in previous Witcher games, their involvement with the Nilfgaard War, and the succession of the Skillege throne.  These all have good stories that are told with the same importance as the main quest.  And they ARE important as decisions in these secondary quests will effect the main quest as well as the ending.  I shit you not, there is even a little bit of Mass Effect 2 style loyalty missions going on here.  I can't say more about that due to heavy spoilers but trust me.  Also, I was genuinely shocked when I failed a secondary quest because I kept putting it off, only for a dude in the main quest to say he killed my contact for it.  What the hell?  Main quests also effect secondary quests?

This is how you do side quests in open world games!  These ones mattered.  They had a great deal of variation too especially with the stories.  Sometimes you're hunting a unique monster only found in this quest.  Sometimes you're getting a little too involved in the war considering you're supposed to be a "neutral" Witcher.  One really unique secondary quest has you hunting down a serial killer.*  They never get boring or tired since they have as much production value as the main quests.

*I am still SO pissed that I failed this quest.

And this guy knows about ALL of it.    

For some reason though, the card game Gwent, horse racing, and fantasy fight club are included as secondary quests as well.  The fight clubs had next to no story and were dull.  The horse racing had story but it was repetitive and easy to exploit an AI bug,  And Gwent....okay, lots of people love it but I'm not a big card game fan.  It just isn't my jam so I mostly ignored it (also I suck at it).

Then you have Witcher Contracts.  Go to a town, look at the notice board, go to the contract giver, get some details, talk to witnesses/examine bodies, track down the monster using your Witcher sense (more on gameplay later), then fight it.  These are pretty standard in structure but even these are good.  Each ends with a boss fight of some beefed up monster so proper planning is a must (and a handful are unique monsters only found in the Contracts).  You can even do a contract on accident if you run into a contracted monster while exploring.  Kill it, and you can still go get some money from the contract giver for doing a contract you didn't know existed.

Yeah. "Some" money.  LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT THING!  The payment is never enough.

Then you have treasure hunts, which are almost mandatory to look cool, but a miss with this game.  This is the only way to find Witcher gear and you NEED Witcher gear because.....every normal armor you buy in stores looks like shit!  They are terrible on the eyes.  I've never cared about my video game protagonist needing to look cooler like I have in this game.  Only the Witcher gear looks cool.

Gross.

You find this stuff by buying maps from merchants but once you start on one Witcher gear path it's not wise to jump to another path.  I went with the Cat School gear because it complemented my character build, which was rogue like some magic.  But after the starter stuff, I could never find a goddamn map to find the upgrades.  I tried finding them randomly in the world and yeah, I found almost every upgrade to some Witcher gear....the Bear School gear which is for a tank build gahhhhhhhh.  What am I supposed to do?  Run around the entire huge in game world and find the ONE merchant who sells the ONE map to my upgraded Cat School gear?  Then, DO IT AGAIN for the next upgrade?*  Nah.  I said fuck it and Googled it.

Nice.

 *Also, I didn't max out my levels but I was close.  Why in the HELL were some merchants selling swords that did more base damage than my Mastercrafted Cat School Witcher swords?!?!  You going to tell me this Velen Longsword, one of the most common swords in the game, is better than my mastercrafted Witcher sword????  Get the fuck out.

Finally, you have generic side quests shown randomly in the world with "question marks" on the map.  These can be Guarded Treasures (fight a tough monster that rarely led to Witcher gear so I usually sold all that shit). Bandit Camps (that sometimes lead to a "hidden treasure" that was usually garbage or you free a prisoner who gives you garbage), abandoned villages (where you clear out monsters for a populace to move back into...cause it's a nice thing to do I guess), and other random bullshit.

Even Witcher 3 has these hackneyed open world game conventions.  Copy paste, copy paste.  They are pretty fine when you come across one while traveling, but many need to be searched for.  It really did feel like busy work doing the ones off the beaten path.

It's so big

HOWEVER, the shitty repetitive side quests don't feel like they detract from the main or secondary quests.  While there are a fuck load of them, it feels like...dare I say, a 70/30 split in favor of the main AND secondary quests combined?  They are actually SIDE quests and not the main part of the game.  And at least they are very quick to do, once you finally get to its destination.  So really, the most annoying things are 1. There's A LOT of them and 2. Traveling to them is the biggest time sink.  Baby steps.  We're getting better here.

I've already alluded to this but choice is important in this game as well, particularly in the narrative.  Unlike other choice heavy games though, this game really doesn't hold your hand about it.  Sometimes it's based on dialogue options, sometimes it's based on actions in a particular quest.  Simply doing or not doing some quests seem to have effects at all.  The adult orientated Witcher doesn't pull punches here either as some quests give you two AWFUL choices.  Let's just say I saved a bunch of orphans (yay me!), by releasing an ancient demon who later massacres a village (boo me!).  It is a key moment in this game and a brutal choice.  Beware the Crones of Crookback Bog.*

*I don't even care if this is kind of a spoiler.  Seriously, beware.  That whole sequence is fucked up. What was I supposed to do? SPOILER (Let them eat the orphans?).

Quality is not compromised by quantity in this open world game......oh man it felt good to write that.  One more time, quality is not compromised by quantity.  Yes, this game is huge with a ton of shit to do, but people like me also have that tight narrative that we've been craving in our RPG's.  The overall story was very good and the ending I got was just perfect for how I played it.

Almost every video game journalism outlet had a near 3 way tie for Game of the Year for 2015.  MGSV: The Phantom Pain, Fallout 4, and the Witcher 3:Wild Hunt.  Witcher 3 ended up winning in almost all of them, and for good reason.

This is the transitional, evolution of games, I've been waiting for.  If future open world games can improve on this foundation, we may see their problems vanish.

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Follow me on Twi - wait a minute.  I have more to say!  (See spoiler footnote at end of post too)

The world of Witcher is great and mayyyyybe my favorite among fantasy universes in video games.  (Final Fantasy doesn't count).  Based on Polish folklore, you get some rarely seen monsters.  Yes, you have Griffins, Wyverns, Vampires, Warewolves, Golems, Harpies, etc. but you also get things like Foglets.  They are near invisible, super annoying, and hunt in the fog.  You get Fiends which, oh god, Fiends are like huge demonic reindeer.  My favorite is the Leshens, which is basically an evil tree.  They can control crows and are tough fights even when you out level them.  Also, there is a thing called a Botchling.  It's an evil fetus....

...uh...

Or is it evil?  That's the thing with some of these monsters.  Some can be helped with non violent means and just need a curse lifted.  The, like, two demons in the game (which are thankfully super rare unlike Dragon Age) can't really be killed so you have to trick them.  Trolls seem sort of intelligent, well dumb intelligent, and can usually be talked too.  Also, I never once killed a Succubus. They are obviously VERY intelligent, they can speak to you fluently, and even the bestiary questions wither they are monsters or a forgotten race.  It also says they don't kill people and some are immune to their sexy ways so....meh.

The environment is great.  The swamps of Velen are creepy and full of monsters.  Novigrad is huge and I still don't fully know my way around the city.  Skillege is a bunch of mountainous islands with awesome people I want to drink and fight with (they're basically Vikings).  One of the most awe inspiring moments I had with this game is riding my horse into Novigrad for the first time.  It was some uncanny valley shit.  You see tall buildings on the horizon, then you come across the villages outside the city walls and the streets are packed with people, then you enter the city and wow.  I just...it's weird but it was one of those amazing "quiet moments" you see in video games.  Hard to explain.

It's pretty.

The gameplay is pretty great too even if it has some flaws.  Combat is action orientated but has strategy elements almost unheard of in games.  You also have magic, alchemy, crafting and Witcher Sense which is alright.  Witcher Sense is basically just like any other Assassins Creed vision or Bat vision from the Arkham games only better.  It isn't blindingly dumb looking, it's mostly for following monster tracks and hunting for clues, and it feels far more useful than in other games with the same mechanic.  I know that's subjective as hell but it is.

Combat mechanics are basically like a Dark Souls-Devil May Cry-Arkham mashup with a quick attack, strong attack, side step dodge, roll dodge, block/parry, etc....but looser than Dark Souls.  They aren't SUPER tight, but tight enough. The strong attack has a lonnng wind up so I rarely used it and parrying only works with humans although you can time an Arkham style counter attack.  I went heavy on the quick attack and dodges. Instead of the game going for typical hack-n-slash combos, I ended up using a lot of "roll then attack" tactics as quick/strong attack combos seemed pointless. However, this did kind of lead me to button mash two buttons a lot.  I know this is gonna be a killer for some people reading but luckily there are other nuances.

You also have some magic attacks called "signs".  They are a fire attack, a telekinetic knockdown, a shield, a magic slowdown trap, and mind control.  It is an absolute MUST to upgrade the mind control because it's also useful in dialogue as you can Jedi mind trick people.   Also, the magic trap is the only way to make Wraiths vulnerable to attacks, and the shield is useful against Ice Giants, Cyclopses, and other heavy hitters.  Telekinesis can knock a shield out of a bandits hands if you upgrade it enough too.  You need to use a variation of signs depending on the situation and the enemy.  It's a good mix and I used them all to go with my "roll then attack" strategy.

Missed opportunity to call this "Dragon Hand".

Also in your arsenal is a crossbow for the flying and underwater enemies (it doesn't deal much damage and is used more as a distraction), bombs which I consistently forget I have, and other various magical doo dads including a lamp that only works in one early quest but is never used again.

You also have potions, dedoctions, and oils from the Alchemy system.  This is a mixed bag because once I got to higher levels, I rarely used any of them outside of healing potions and the cat potion that lets you see in the dark.  The Alchemy system itself is cool as you only need to brew a potion once and you will always have it as long as you have alcohol to replenish it.  It admittedly takes some getting used to though.  Just meditate and your potions are restored because why not I guess?  Okay, cool.  You can eventually upgrade these potions if you find the schematics and the increasingly more rare resources needed for them.

Oils can be applied to a sword to do more damage to a certain class of enemy and I stopped using these after a while.  They are important early on but again, level destroys all need for them.  Dedoctions are super specific and I NEVER used one because they all have a risk benefit thing going and the benefit was always something bizarre like adrenaline points.*

*I don't know what adrenaline is. Seriously.  No idea.

That said, I still liked the combat.  All of this gives you a bunch of options.  This game is kind of tough, at first, but main quests give out a TON of experience points so it's easy to become over levelled mid-game if you decide to put off side quests (which give out hardly any EXP).  Still though, end game was still challenging as main quests scale to your level.

The Witcher 3's skill tree is impossible to fill out everything so you need to pick a speciality.  I went with upgrading my mind control, telekinesis, magic trap, and quick attack quick attack quick attack, soooooo much quick attack I eventually unlocked this...thing where I whip a sword around for like 10 hits like I'm wielding a light saber in a Star Wars prequel and it's awesome.  You can also put points into Alchemy but I never did...which is probably why I saw their usefulness decline.

Best for Chemistry majors.

There is also a crafting system that is super close to what Dragon Age: Inquisition uses but tedious as hell.  You still need to collect schematics, like with the aforementioned Witcher gear, and you need to collect resources via looting, picked up in nature, or bought from merchants.  The one annoying thing is that in order to get weapons made, you visit a blacksmith.  To get armor, you visit an armorer, and the two are NEVER close together (except in Kear Trolde, Skillege).  Even then, you have to find someone who is skilled enough to create what you want.  There is only one mastercraft worthy blacksmith and one mastercraft worthy armorer in the world and of course they don't live anywhere near each other.  Plus, the good stuff requires some hard to come by ingredients that either ONE merchant SOMEWHERE sales OR you can craft the ingredient from other ingredients that SURPRISE you don't have OR can be stripped from an item that WHAT DO YOU KNOW, you accidentally sold it.  ARRRGH.  Basically, you have to do lots and LOTS of running around to get that sweet gear crafted.

Overall, the actual gameplay has its flaws but they are almost more like "strange qwirks" than actual flaws.  Other than the annoying crafting, everything is entertaining and fun, but it's not scaled properly with character level.  At higher levels, there is no need for battle planning anymore as you can just one hit kill most enemies*.  Granted, this might be because of the way I played and in retrospect (that whole never upgrading my alchemy skill tree thing), I should have bumped the game up to a higher difficulty when it was getting too easy.  That's my fault, but I still remember dying on the same Nightwraith over 10 fucking times who was only one level above me.  I didn't feel comfortable doing so cause I always thought that super hard dungeon was coming up.

*This over-confidence screwed me a few times though.  Earth Elementals can go fuck themselves.  Definitely need a tank build to take them on without any buffs.  

This guy is nuts going up against one under-levelled.

Witcher 3: Wild Hunt is not perfect but goddamn do I love it.  If I played the game again differently, I'm sure I could use the Alchemy system completely different than I did the first time.  Of course I spammed one attack when I put a majority of my skill points into that one attack.  It was still fun and goddamn does this narrative patch up the flaws in the gameplay, kinda like a bizarro MGSV for me.

The world of Witcher is too rich to be left alone forever.  CD Projekt Red is sick of it, I'm sure, but come on.  Geralts story is done but we could visit this world again.  I'd like too.  (Ciri maybe?) .  And unlike Mass Effect, it's a universe than can easily be accommodating to every ending.  Let's do this again some time.

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SPOILER SECTION.

I have a few points I want to bring up.  Well, more like questions.

1.  WHERE IS THE THIRD CRONE?  I know she survived to warn the Wild Hunt, which is why the last mission causes Avalach to do his Admiral Ackbar "It's a Trap" impression, but she isn't present for the actual final quest.  She better not have been saved for DLC.

2.  How come we don't get resolution to Pricilla and Dandelion's story?  Does Pricilla get her voice back?  Also, I failed to kill the serial killer and he keeps leaving his sermons all over Novigrad taunting me.  Is he going to come back and finish the job so to speak?  I doubt he will but it seems like a weird oversight when even that lady in the "haunted house" with a Godling story got an ending.

3.  Finally, my Novigrad ending left the city still being racist as shit.  I have no idea what I could have done to prevent this.  I helped the mages escape.  I killed the leader of the Witch Hunters.  What more could I have possibly done?

6 Star Wars Rogue One Trailer Reactions to the Trailer Reactions

What is it with people overreacting to movie trailers?  I saw the trailer to Rogue One and thought, "that looks like an enjoyable mov - IS THAT THE EMPEROR?  Why is he kneeling?  Why can't I stop looking at Forest Whitaker's lazy eye in everything he's in?  Am I a bad person?"  The answer to that is, probably, but you know what I DIDN'T think about?  Another female protagonist.

Sigh.

Lets do this.

(Every point I bring up is based on a comment I've seen on Twitter, Youtube, or wherever).

1.  A Female Lead is Unrelatable.

...But a laser sword wielding, telekinetic wizard is?

I assume these people are fans of previous Star Wars films but even if they are not, how can you NOT relate.  This reeks of close-mindedness as not being able to relate to a woman is basically saying you don't give two shits about what they think, feel, live through, etc.  And don't bother trying to defend yourself saying, "blurh, blargh, burp, but I am open-minded!".  Women are half the population.  If you can't relate to them, in a fictional universe, how the hell do you relate to them in reality?  I'd hate to see your opinions on smaller population numbers like Gay and Trans folks.

Unrelatable.

2. This is Katniss Again and Pandering to the Hunger Games Crowd.

First of all, THIS....IS.....STAR....WARS.  They don't need to pander to anybody.  It's only the most popular franchise in any media in history.

Secondly, based on what?  Felicity Jones sorta looks like Katniss (you trying to say all white women look the same?) and because of that one "I rebel" line?  This is a trailer.  Every movie trailer for every action movie ever looks the same now.  A bunch of quick cuts, some out of context action sequences, some shots of plot devices, a few catchy one liners, and a tease for something big.  You got Katniss out of that?

Thirdly....nice red herring.  This is a good way to say, "I am sick of action movies with badass females who are flawless but I'm totally not insecure about being beaten up by a woman."

Not the protagonist but still scary.  Also, yes. she could beat me up and I'D WELCOME IT.

Speaking of flawless.

3.  Just like Rey and Katniss, This is Another Female Protagonist Who is Flawless so They Don't Piss Off Feminists.

How can you possibly know that?  It was a trailer.

I can't speak for Katniss as I only saw the first Hunger Games movie and complained about it ripping off the far superior Battle Royale, but Rey isn't flawless.  She barely escapes the assault on Jakku, she gets captured later on (but saves herself), and even though she is badass in the final fight with Kylo Ren, there is an air of uncertainty to her as well.  Daisy Ridley (badass name by the way) did a great job being badass and fucking terrified in that final fight.*  She is going up against a Sith Lord after all.

*I know this opinion is based 100% on acting and that is super subjective.  My other points still stand though.

SHE'S SO FLAWLESS!

Also, if you want to talk flawless, how about Luke in A New Hope.  The dude somehow pilots an X-Wing without any previous experience*, somehow doesn't get killed when Vader has a clear shot but is saved by Han instead, then fires a weapon he has never used before into a 2 meter sized hole while BLIND and using a literal Force he only recently learned he could manipulate.  Luke had exceptionally good luck during the assault on the first Death Star.  Hell, he had flawless luck.

*Don't you fucking tell me that the Landspeeder was enough experience.  That is the Star Wars equivalent of a car.  I can drive a car, does that mean I can fly an airplane?  I will fight you.

Finally, "internet feminists" frequently complain about badass female characters just being gender swapped versions of male characters (See Kill Bill).  I don't think they would want "flawless".

4.  ANOTHER female protagonist.  This is a Trend.

The saying goes, "Two is a coincidence, three is a trend."  This is the 2nd movie.  Calm down.

And while yes, the main series will probably keep Rey in all three, meaning 4 Star Wars movies with a female lead, did you forget about the other spinoffs?  There is going to be a young Han Solo movie and well as a Boba Fett one.

If this is so called reverse sexism, which this argument implies, you almost never see spinoffs of female protagonist movies (Looking at you Black Widow and Wonder Woman).  At least the male characters GET their own movies.

This might be the most misleading poster ever.

5.  This Movie is Feminist/Leftist/SJW Pandering.

Again, Star Wars doesn't need to pander.  Remember how awful the prequels were?  They still brought in a fuck load of money.

I...don't even know what to say to these people anymore.  It's obviously the extreme right wing and Gamergate crowd (which is the same thing) saying this (and MRAS!!).  If they ever read this, obviously Gamergate will deny having any political leaning despite their only mainstream allies being extreme right wing nut jobs and their actual namesake being coined by Adam fucking Baldwin.  Anecdotally, one of the several times I talked with a GG'er, I brought this up and he claimed he was actually left wing in reality.  I asked him how he felt on immigration as a litmus test. He IMMEDIATELY changed the subject to Pokemon of all things.  I did not ask how he felt about dogfighting.

It's so predictable it's sad.  They seem to think they have us all fooled but literally everybody knows they're dicks.  Like...it's not even remotely a secret.

Also, if an MRA reads this, I'm sorry your penis is very tiny.  Go buy the biggest truck you can find to compensate. 

Yeah.  I'm sure Disney is scared of you.

Also, why does Chewie look like we wants to creepily fuck that lightsaber?

Anybody, GG, MRA, or otherwise associated with the extreme right wing will claim something about political correctness and free speech which....HEY.

6.  Something, Something, Political Correctness, Free Speech, and Censorship.

The big three arguments bigots like to bring up to justify being a bigot.  This is broader than Star Wars so I need to go slightly off topic here.

Political Correctness is code for "it used to be okay to say or joke about this thing".  Free Speech is brought up as "Hey, I can say whatever I want".  Censorship happens when you try to call them on their bullshit and they are so anti-censorship.

It's the last defense Trifecta.  Unfortunately, Political Correctness is nothing but a political buzz term, they don't understand how Free Speech works, and they are extremely contradictory on Censorship.

Having a story with the kind of people who exist in reality is PC.  

"Political Correctness", the modern term, was invented as self-critical satire in the 70's.  Of course, politicians being politicians, completely missed the satire and ran with it (See any president using "Born in the USA" as a campaign song).  The term is so callously used by pundits, I'm hard pressed to find any buzz term more political than "political correctness".  It's very usage is still....satire.  Only, the people using it don't realize it cause they're dumb.

Free Speech apparently only works for bigots and nobody else.  Sure, you can say your sexist/racist/homophobic/transphobic bullshit, but that free speech also means people can call you out on your bullshit.  Also, free speech does not mean freedom from consequences, nor does it mean anybody must give you a platform, NOR does it mean anybody has to listen.  Blocking you on twitter isn't infringing on your free speech. It's the listener exercising theirs.

Obligatory.

"But not taking my opinion seriously is censorship!".  Uh...no, it's not.  You still think and say your bullshit.  Plus, making ANY of my 5 previous talking points is basically saying the creators of Rogue One are wrong and should listen to you.  In a way, you are arguing FOR censorship.  They decided to have a female lead simply because a woman can be anything...and you are the one who has a problem with it.  

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That's the kicker.  They don't ever realize they're opinion is dumb and stupid.  Instead, it's the system that is mocking/ignoring them that panders to those who they hate.  It's not always women, but for this Rogue One trailer reaction, it is.  They think men are going to disappear from protagonist roles in action movies even though that will never happen.  It is impossible to argue that Men haven't been THE dominant gender in those roles through history but they do anyway.

And....

I think I know why.

If all this happened during a 3-4 month span when I was 22 years old...I may have agreed with them.  After a bitter break up with a long term girlfriend,  I hated the SHIT out of women.  It only got worse since I forgot how to be single, every girl's boyfriend was juuuuust the biggest asshole, and they all refused to have sex with me because.....

I was a piece of shit.  I never really tried to learn about them.  I was always trying to impress them, look cool, BE cool, and be the nicest guy.  I eventually gave up and stopped giving a shit about trying to find a girlfriend and you know....just live my life and be the real me.  This had an ironic (?) twist though because as soon as I stopped caring, I started to get a ton of dates.  It's also during this time that I met my future wife.

Some day, my love.

When I was trying and failing to get a girlfriend....I repeat, I HATED women.  It's a bizarre hopeless feeling getting rejected by the single ladies and falling for the taken ones whose boyfriends were real assholes (This was mostly not true.  In reality, most of these guys were good dudes.  Later I would learn an emotion called "Jealousy").  During this time, it really felt like I was powerless and women had all the power.  So when women/feminists say "white dudes" are living the privileged life, I can see why people like my 22 year old self would say, "what the fuck are you talking about?"  

The people who complain about another female protagonist in Star Wars is probably a lot like past me.  It's another point for their "women have all the power" argument.  Although....I still don't know why they would be so angry about a woman protagon - OHHHHHHH......

It's about sex isn't it?

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As far as we know, Luke is still a virgin.

The Open World Video Game Paradox.

I've hinted at hating open world games in several video game posts but I'd like it to be known, I don't hate them.  I actually like some of them.  But the thing is, I've never loved one.  There are several issues that plague open world games that have kept this barrier up for me and (most) recent open world games seem to be content on keeping these problems going indefinitely.  It only seems like it's going to get worse too as every western RPG in existence is or has gone open world.

It seems like the reason so many games have gone open world, even in franchises that were not previously, is because of...

1. Skyrim's popularity
2. GTA5's sales numbers, although I'm not sure why GTA would only now influence game studios.
3. Stupid complaints of games being too linear.
4. Sometimes justified complaints of games being too short.
5. Wanting choice, "player agency", in games.

Just making a game open world solves the linear problem, even though it wasn't a "problem" to begin with.  Great games can be, and have been, linear as hell.  The vast majority of stories are told linear.  Just taking in account this one point, open world games already have an inherent flaw in trying to fix a problem that doesn't exist.

First image when you Google "Linear Video Games"

Like linearity is FFXIII's largest problem....

Open world games typically have a main quest, which is usually linear fancy that, but to solve the problem of "being too short" they fill their worlds with things to do, known as "side quests".  This is my main problem with open world games.  It's not that side quests exist, or even that there are too many, but the side quests are almost always a dozen copies of the same thing.  Studios faced with the dilemma of creating an open world, while also filling it with enough things to do so that the game isn't too short, creates a quantity over quality problem.

"Too short.  Not enough pointless fetch quests and dungeon clearing." - Some Asshole

Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain, a game I really liked, was praised for having side quests that don't get repetitive by most game journalism outlets.  I...don't know what the fuck they are talking about because the titles of the side quests themselves are repetitive and numbered.  The Side Op titled "Extract the Highly Skilled Soldier" eventually reaches an "Extract the Highly Skilled Soldier 16".  SIXTEEN.  You do the same thing SIXTEEN times.  Yes, the locations vary and thus present different obstacles each time, but at its core, you are still doing the same thing over and over.  There is maybe 7 different "types" of side op but you do each one over a dozen times.*

*Don't get me wrong.  Every game is repetitive about something.  But at least in linear and pseudo-open world games, there is a narrative to give that repetition gravitas.  Also, MGSV's repetitive side missions are probably a good template on how to make them enjoyable....for a while.

What do the dots and boxes and boxes filled in mean?   

The worst offender, that I've played recently, might be Dragon Age: Inquisition.  Every time you come across a rift (a green vagina in the sky), you fight a mix of 5 demons that you fight a million times in the game, then for some reason, have to fight a 2nd wave of the same demons, then you can "hold X" to close the rift.  There are...........81 rifts in this game.  EIGHTY FUCKING ONE?!?!?*  Well, 81 with the DLC but holy shit.  Oh and don't even get me starting on the fucking shards.  You go to a telescope thing, usually on top of a mountain or cliff, look around to "mark" the shards, then go running around collecting them which sometimes requires platforming in a game NOT EVEN SLIGHTLY optimized for platforming.  You need them to unlock the hardest, coolest dungeon in the game.  How many do you need?.....114.  For perspective, I think I have over 114 books in my house but it took decades to accumulate.  Collecting 114 of anything in a game is downright masochistic.  

*What programmer was like, "You know what?  I think the game needs one more rift".

Sky vagina can be closed with your magical hand.  There is innuendo here......

For reference, Dragon Age: Inquisition has 10 main quests.  Just 10.  These are the only quests that have some uniqueness to them as each one is a bit different.*  MGSV has 38 main missions. OH SURE, it looks like 50 but 12 of those missions are actually just repeating previous missions with different difficulty parameters.  It's a super bizarre design choice in Chapter 2 and a band aid over the content that was supposed to be there (fuck Konami).  

*For those of you reading that have heard about Bioware using Dragon Age: Inquisition as a template for Mass Effect: Andromeda....you have been warned.**  My two theories, No Man's Sky will fail to live up to its lofty promises ie. Spore, and ME: Andromeda will have the same flaws DA:I does.***

**Or not.  

***I WANT TO BE WRONG.  I'm being pessimistic.  Please let me be wrong.****

****AAAAAHHHHHH*****

***** Did you know this is supposed to be Lindsay Lohan?

This is the root of the quantity over quality problem.  I don't care how creative the development team is, you are going to run out of ideas and/or money and just copy paste the same activities over and over again to get that "100's of hours of content" label the publisher seems to think we all want.  This brings me too the elephant in the room, Skyrim (and Fallout kinda).  

For the purpose of this post, I'm going to ignore the fact that Skyrim (and Fallout but it's slightly better) has AWFUL combat mechanics that seem ripped from Ultima 7....released in 1992, only Skyrim is in first person.  Just hack at stuff and hope your stats are better (I know there are laughable stealth mechanics and other garbage that doesn't work as well as it should ).  I'm also going to ignore that Skyrim has the worst inventory management I have ever seen.  I mean, holy hell, most people play with a fan mod that organizes your inventory for you.  Why is everything in just a list of shit?  Why aren't things organized into categories like weapons, armor, items, etc.?   For fucks sake, Final Fantasy still gets that right and that franchise is zombie roadkill. 

Uh....I said I was going to ignore those issues.  Right.

"Hello and welcome to beautiful Vancouver".

Skyrim is the screaming neon sign of my second biggest complaint with open world games; The storytelling is usually awful.

In Skyrim, not only does it have a shitty story, it doesn't even attempt to tell a....story! Never mind a good one. You are the dragonborn for some reason (is that ever explained?), then you go collect things for Jarls/witches/random dudes to help them solidify power/while ALSO wanting your help to fight dragons (not how bargaining works!), then you fight dragons the end.  I mean, look at this ending.  ZZZZZZZZ....uh, I mean, "What an epic RPG!!!!  I especially like the part where you hack at a dragon's butt for 2 minutes."  Come on.  Even fans of Skyrim haven't finished Skyrim. It says A LOT about the game when even its fans don't give a shit about the story.  Almost every review of that game is "10 outta 10!  But, uh, the story sucks."

No they didn't.  That was patched out.

Open world game storylines like Skyrim lack pace.  The player is tasked with pacing the story and that creates all sorts of weirdness.  It's a running joke about open world games having a main story that says the "world is coming to an end unless you defeat this evil immediately!" while their presentation wants the player to take their time and go exploring for shiny trinkets.  Some games have tried to fix this by lowering the stakes (GTA5 with one kidnapping exception), or by deliberately having a story that works with pacing slow as molasses (Most of MGSV, Some of Sleeping Dogs, and Witcher 3). Others, like Deus Ex: Human Revolution, present a story where the world isn't going to end UNTIL you are locked into the linear last 15 hours.

"If only I knew how awful Megan Reed is."

This lack of pacing is a problem that can't really be addressed unless some aspects of player choice are taken away....and that's the paradox.  How can open world games give players a compelling story if the player decides how and when a chapter is played?  This paradox can be expanded to a compelling story, plus meaningful side stories, while also giving the player choice.  This is the philosophical problem with open world games, and no game has really solved it.

Because of Skyrim and GTA, most games don't really bother to even try, though I know I'm not the only one who gets annoyed if not outright angry at these issues.  I have a feeling more people will start thinking this way too since all singleplayer games are turning into 1.) Indie, 2.) episodic stuff like Life is Strange, or 3.)  MEGA BUDGET AAA open world game.  This will get tired.  Even Skyrim fans will get sick of playing Skyrim ripoffs eventually.

"Farcry is Skyrim with guns!!!" -  every idiot reviewer ever.  Farcry is Skyrim with radio towers.

So...am I writing this post just out of spite?  Am I jealous (a little actually) that I can't love these games?  Deus Ex: Human Revolution isn't really open world.  Final Fantasy 9 isn't, nor is any Persona game.  Ultima kind of is but those games had severe level/gear requirements that basically forced it into a linear game.  Is Mass Effect open world?  The first one is actually my least favorite of the three.  Yet even that sure doesn't feel like it.*

*BTW, I'm ignoring JRPG's for this post since they have stayed mostly linear.  That said, how WEIRD IS IT going to be that Final Fantasy XV is open world?  It's not Final Fantasy anymore Jason.  It's not Final Fantasy anymore Jason.  It has the name but it's not Final Fantasy anymore Jason.

Maybe I'm an idealist here because RPG's are my favorite video game genre and nearly every single one has gone open world.  Maybe expecting side quests to be worthwhile, have interesting stories themselves, or even better, actually be related to the main story is too much to ask.  Maybe expecting side quests to have a great deal of variation will never happen because of video game budgets and publishers unwilling to take risks.  Maybe I just have to expect the leader of a religion/army has to go pick fucking flowers because the player character must do everything themselves.  Maybe I have to except being Dragonborn because SERIOUSLY was this ever explained?

IT'S LIKE ANGELS SINGING.

Well.....I'm for the first time, optimistic that these issues may not last forever.  Witcher 3: Wild Hunt is SO good you guys.  Yes, it still has some of these issues, but holy shit there seems to be a drastic jump forward into solving them.  This might be the transitional game we, errrr, I have been waiting for.  I haven't finished it yet as of this writing, but I might, just might, love it.

Witcher 3: Wild Hunt review coming soon.

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A couple notes that didn't fit into my thesis.

1.  In case anybody reads this who isn't one of my Twitter friends or non-Twitter friends, if you like Skyrim...THAT'S OKAY.  I like some objectively shitty things too.  It's okay.  I'm just expressing an opinion.  HOWEVER, the more games try to be like Skyrim, the more games as a whole suffer.  Variety is the spice of life and all that jazz.  We all lose if we just get different versions of the same game.

2.  I didn't really address how video game publishers are influenced by GTA's sales but OF COURSE they are.  It's the reason every movie is Star Wars now.....or.....wait, no they aren't.  Granted, most big budget movies are "Star Wars" or "Marvel Movie Empire" or "Same Thing" but at least we get a Mad Max: Fury Road....and high budget war dramas...and high budget period dramas....and weirdly high budget comedies that usually tank but is kinda okay....and....and....

Okay, so those too are kind of rare, but the thing is, movies have learned how to do medium budget movies.  Why can't games do this?  It's either AAA or indie.  Almost no in between.  The only recent two I can think of is Alien:Isolation and Xcom2.  I'm sure I could Google more (Bayonetta 2 maybe?) but my point is, I can think of only a few off the top of my head while I could list more movies.

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I never finished Skyrim either.