Favorite and Not Favorite Video Games of 2016 Sort Of

I totally wanted to do this for 2015 as well but I suddenly needed to move to another city in December which cut down on the time I had for writing.  So...each category, where applicable, I have included a 2015 version for shits and giggles.  

Ground rules: I must have played the game....that's it.  Here are the best, and a little bit of the worst, games of 2016.  

Game of 2016 That Came Out in 2016...

Overwatch

Review here.
Competetive Season One Thoughts here.
A super inaccurate beta impressions here.  (Don't read that).

Like it was going to be something else?  I typically shy away from multiplayer only games but this was too good to ignore.  The gameplay is really good even if the balance is still a little off (poor useless Bastion).  They added a much needed arcade mode for more casual stuff as well as making Quick Play more of a practice mode for Comp even though the entire rule set isn't the same yet.

The characters really sell it though, from inspiring to...lets say, thirsty.  For such a shitty 2016 for minorities and women, Overwatch has a ton of representation.  While three women follow typical sexy game models (Tracer, Mercy, and Widowmaker...though I guess she represents the blueish-purple skinned people), others don't.  Pharah is old school Samus from Metroid in full armor and that's just to start.  Ana is a grandmother, Mei is short and chunky (also, bae), and Zarya is a hero to beefcake women who might be Trans according to every fan theory.  Also, recently released Sombra has been welcomed with a ton of applause from the Hispanic community because holy shit.  What other Hispanic women characters can you name in video games?  Not a whole lot out there.

The dudes are all over the place too.  Roadhog looks like he weighs 1000 lbs, Junkrat is a scraggly fucker, Reinhardt is ancient, and some of them....are robots.  Lucio might be a BIT of a stereotype as a black DJ but how many also roller blade?  Yeah.  Exactly.

The only thing that might kill this game is the community.  Don't get me wrong, it's still mostly fine.  It's not toxic.  It's also popular enough that toxicity tends to be sort of rare.  But, that liiiiiittle bit always annoys me.  I work in service jobs.  My tolerance for asshats during my gaming time isn't that high and a big reason I stick to singleplayer games most of the time.  In the right mood, I can either laugh them off or talk shit right back IF they are directing their angst to me.  Other times, even when it's not directly at me but just the whole team, which is the most common, sometimes I'm just like nah.  Quit the game and open Civilization VI instead.  Wish that wasn't the case but what are you gonna do?

2015 version:  Life is Strange.

Review here
Criticism review here.

Still love this game.  Season 2 is gonna be weird with all new characters but hey, I'm down.

Almost every critical review of this game has a, "but I can't help but kind of love it" vibe.  Yeah.  I get ya.  It's rare to see a game revolve around a relationship, specifically between two teenage girls friendship/potentially romantic relationship depending on how you played it.  That...sounds like a dumb porn but trust me it's not.  It's sweet, and touching, and heartbreaking, and all those emotions David Cage wishes he could do in his games.  There is a layer of authenticity here in its characterization that is SUPER rare in video games and something I cherish.

Runner Up Game of 2016 That Came out in 2016...

Deus Ex:Mankind Divided.

Review here.
Story review here.
Microtransaction bullshit here.  Also, one of my least read things.  I make good arguments against this practice yo.

Despite all my bitching, I do really like this game.  I'm currently playing through it a second time to try a perfect stealth, no kill run (except for some scripted moments where you have to be seen).  It's going well but I'm not at the hard parts yet.

Most of my complaining was about this games pretty good story just hitting the wrong marks.  WELL...that was before heir Trump got elected so now....I'M NOT SO SURE.  I'm (sort of) kidding here as its themes don't really match its real world references but hey, they mostly don't match BECAUSE the previous game is one of my all time favorites.  On its own, it kind of works in a sick way.

2015 version:  Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain

Review here.
Quiet controversy here.
Spoiler filled hate fest here.

I'm seriously sick of talking about this game but 3 real quick points.  1.  The gameplay is phenomenal and I still stand by my position that this is the best stealth gameplay of all time.  2.  The story is bizarre while also being so unlike any other Metal Gear Solid story it will infuriate long time fans.  3.  Fuck Konami.

Best Game Of The Last Two Years Because I Played It In 2016 Despite Coming Out In 2015 And Yes, Better Than Overwatch...

Baddest ass picture ever

The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt

Review Here......That is all I said about this fantastic game?!?!

I can not rave about this game enough.  I want to do a 11-20 favorite game post even though it gets kinda fuzzy after 15 and this one is seriously climbing the more I think about it.  First open world game I've loved.  Even in my review, my criticisms were pretty nitpicky which...I HAD TO DO because the game is that good.  One of the two non-nitpick complaints was about the oppressive number of random bullshit to do on the map but I remembered, "hey! I don't actually have to do all that if I don't want too"...so I didn't.  The other was about the absurd amount of running around needed for the crafting to work right but that's only if you want to get the best gear.  The main quests and secondary quests (which were given as much care as the main quests) were more than enough to still push this game over 60 hours on that stuff alone.  All the rest puts this game into marathon territory (I played 120 hours and still didn't do everything).

I want to talk about 3 things I didn't mention in the review.

1.  I have complained about the villain deficit in fiction a lot but the villains in this game are great.  Top to bottom!  Raid a bandit camp and afterward you will find a letter the bandit never got to send (because you murdered everyone) to his wife and kids.  It will say something about how this last robbery will let them be able to buy bread for a few weeks.  Augh...my heart breaks.  Why are you humanizing this game's version of Goombas game?  And at the top, even the main villains, the Wild Hunt, are sympathetic as fuck.  I still don't want to spoil it but trust me.  You kind of feel bad for them.

This game takes the M rating for real.  Instead of just for violence and bewbs (okay lets be fair, just bewbs) it actually deals with adult themes that younger players wouldn't notice or understand.  This game takes the phrase, "Nobody sees themselves as the villain", and makes it a trope.  It's great.  Granted, many of the monsters in the game are just fodder, but like I said in the review, even some of them are sympathetic and some question the idea of if they should even be considered monsters.  But, this is a choice orientated game.  You can choose to slay them, or not.  It's so fucking good.

2.  For a story with as much misery as this story has, this game is smart in taking time off and doing............borderline comic relief moments.  WAIT, wait, hear me out.  For being an emotionless Witcher, Geralt sure does have some sick one liners at times.  They even make fun of the ridiculous trailer to this game that seems out of character and WOW did they rush that scene out.  Also, there is a point in the game were Geralt decides to get drunk with his Witcher buddies.  Protip:  Go all the way.  Trust me.  Fun times happen.  Since this is a choice orientated game, there are times when you can quit drinking and you might think you should because the wife will get mad but I don't even care if this is a spoiler....it doesn't matter.  It won't effect anything.  Just go for it.

3.  There are a couple battle themes but Steel for Humans is fantastic battle music.

I don't have a 2015 version of this.  I just wanted to say Witcher 3 is the best game of 2015 and 2016!  It is that damn good.  I just happened to play it the year after release.  

Worst Game of 2016...

No Man's Sky

Review here.

I was skeptical of this game being like Spore in its promises but didn't want to be right and damnit...I was right.  (Yes, I will gloat about that).  But what is TRULY weird is that the game ended up being like Spore in design too.  The procedurally generated animals in the game do sort of look like Spore animals.  It's fucking bizarre.  I mean, sure, they are less penis shaped, but they are still a weird amalgamation of things....

....OH.  EXCEPT FOR SONIC.  LOVE HIM. * Best thing to come out of this game.  He just wants to go fast.....ahem, anyway.

*Why can't I embed your video bro?

I know a base building update recently came out which is super bizarre since the size of the universe makes back tracking nearly impossible.  You leave the planet you built that base on, gooooood fucking luck ever finding it again.  Also, why does so much of this game seem to rip off Subnautica, yet Subnautica still looks way better?

This game desperately needs a purpose.  It's an existential nightmare.  I think the reason so many of these survival crafting games never make it out of "Steam early access" is because they fail at, you know, THE POINT.  Why am I doing any of this?  I can play around with mechanics in a setting for a while but without a reason to do so, I get bored.  And for such a huge game world, this is one of the loneliest I've ever seen.  Why do the AI aliens suck so hard?  How was that part of the game fucked up so bad?  They're like 1990's (hell, maybe 80's) era PC adventure game NPCs.  They were not good then.  I just remember thinking, "Man, I can't wait for technology to advance to the point where these NPCs can walk around and be active and act like they exist".

I shouldn't dog pile so much on an indie developer that bit off more than it can chew but come on.  They bought into their own hype and over sold their product to an insane degree.  I'd love it if a indie game could compete with AAA games and....wait.  I forgot.  One already did.  It's called Minecraft.


Other Noteworthy Video Game Things:

Shockingly good soundtrack:  VA-11 HALL-A

I gotta course correct here.  In my review I linked to the soundtrack and picked the song that LEAST represents that game.  If anything, take one of my favorites, Every Day is Night.  Yeah it's poppy (no singing though if you are scared) but I dare your head not to start bopping.  I love the transition at 1:40.

I also really like Skyline, which has a slow start but it builds, and You've Got Me which I think is a re-work of the same song.  It sounds like an 80's love ballad.  It's great.

A Horror Game That Was Actually Scary:  Anatomy

While not nightmare inducing, I did distract myself with non-scary Youtube videos before going to bed.  I'm super bummed my stream of it kept quitting and also didn't record but I fixed the recording part at least.  It also made my wife wonder what the hell I was buying when I bought something from someone named "Kitty Horrorshow" on my checking account.

A Game I've Played A Lot But Can't Write a Review On:  Civilization VI

It's like any other Civ ever.  It's the same good game with minor adjustments here and there.  Don't fix what is not broken.  That said..

Probably Best Game I Didn't Play:  Firewatch

It's pretty up my alley.  It just didn't happen and I've seen so much of it I may not actually get around to it for a long time.  Also, 2015 version: Undertale

Two games inexplicably missing...

Back in January, I wrote about 5 games I looked forward to in 2016.*  I've played one of them, Deus Ex.  Two of them got delayed to 2017 (Mass Effect and Persona 5, both of which coming out near each other goddamnit) but what about the other two?

*"Year of Jason"....dude.  I think I've handled 2016 with a fuck ton of grace considering.

Mirrors Edge:Catalyst is still on the back burner and it might be there for a long while.  I got turned off from the constant "combat improvement" talk which I can't see without serious compromises to the parkour controls.  I also hate that it is a prequel since there was so much more to explore in the original game's universe.

Dishonored 2, despite being my Twitter header, is just too similar to Deus Ex (it's steampunk Deus Ex) and I'm not ready to play another stealth game.  Also, the PC launch was super rough so patches are nice.

Finally.

Oxenfree has been sitting on my hard drive for over a month now.  Part of me wants to stream it but my internet will probably make that impossible without constant interruptions.  Also, it's a story driven game so it's questionable how entertaining that would be for people.  I dunno.  I'll likely just play it on my own.

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Other best/worsts of 2016 coming soon.

5 Thoughts About Overwatch Competitive Season One.

Now that season 1 of competitive mode is over for, uh, Overwatch, here are some thoughts.

Here's my rank's for reference:

• 45 at end of placement matches
• 48 my highest
• 32 my lowest
• ended season at 40 

1.  Rank Movement

I know, everybody thinks they are too low, but I actually didn't mind being around 40.  It's the way you move up or down that seems....off.  For one, the system seems too sensitive to streaks.  I dropped out of the 40's, from 46, in one night mostly due to a 6 game losing streak.  Once I started going 50/50 in wins and losses, I hung around 36-37 until I got a 6 game winning streak and made it back to 40, where I stayed for the rest of the season (which was like one week left).  

Going 50% in wins and hanging around a certain rank is peachy, but it felt like the drop was larger during the losing streak than the rise during the winning streak, making the 36-37 purgatory feel wrong.  Like I was slightly lower than where I should be.  It might be something worth looking into.

Also, I've had some pretty big drops after playing half a match or more 5 v 6 and losing badly, even if it was a close match (or even LEADING at first) when it was 6 v 6.  Come on.  That is garbage.

It's so hard to move up and so easy to drop down.

2.  Mei Bae

Depending on the effects of the upcoming Mei buff*, Mei sadly doesn't have a place in competitive.  She's still my highest played hero in Quick Play by two hours, yet I've maybe only played Mei...5 (?!?) matches total in comp.  I've never felt right picking her, even when I'm picking last, because it always felt like another hero would be better for the team.  Likewise, in the rare times I picked Mei quickly, nobody else would pick either a tank or a damn healer, so I would change to play one (and in case you're wondering, yes, I lost those matches).  

*Her buff in the PTR right now is just making her Ult hilariously huge.  That seems crazy pants.  A better buff would be to her normal stats.  A friend recommended just giving her 100 hp more, move her to tank, and be done with it (may have to nerf her icicle shot with that).  I like that idea a lot.  OR, I would like her primary attack to freeze opponents faster since it sometimes feels like it takes a decade unless you catch a slow moving Dva.  Anybody who only plays Quick Play only and might run into multiple Mei's might think that idea is straight up lunacy, but a lone Mei needs a buff.*

Most good team compositions are something like 2 tanks, 2 damage, 2 healers.  Mei is none of those things.  Personal preference but I HATE only having one tank so she shouldn't take that spot.  Having her take a damage spot is playing with fire, so her only really viable spot is one of the healers....but if there isn't a 2nd healer, it's usually (someone else) a Junkrat.  And at least Junkrat is versatile enough he can often be a 3rd damage dealer, Mei...just can't.  Where does she fit?

Adorbs

I only really like Mei on point defense and Control maps.  Hate her on offense and not a fan of payload defense since she's so damn slow.  I also like her with a good Bastion behind her on point defense (which is rare in comp. Not many stay Bastion for long, or switch to him as a last ditch effort) but now you're likely to have 1 tank and unless that tank is a non-aggro Reinhardt, you're screwed.  Likewise, I'm fine with 1 healer on Control maps as long as it's Lucio but you NEED two tanks (not all that opposed to 3 here) so playing Mei here is the most viable as long as you have 2 tanks, Lucio, 2 damage.....but I never get too.  We always need another tank when I want to play Mei here, ALWAYS.  I'm not salty.  No, not.....okay yes.  Very salty. 

3.  Play Your Mains to Move Up....But Learn Who They Are.

Whenever a team needs damage I usually pick Pharah as she is the only one I'm average with.*  Yet, I don't feel like I'm that good at playing damage characters in general because I'm an old man and can't out twitch the kids.  I thought Pharah was one of my mains....she's not.  She's a need pick only now at this point.  

*I'm mediocre with Soldier 76 too but can, not, stand, I repeat, can, not, STAND, playing him on Control maps.  Our team will lose if you let me be damage on Control.  It is my weak point, I don't know why it's only Control maps but it's the truth.**

**I've played a shocking amount of Reaper in Quick Play and even a little in comp but don't remember any of it.  I don't like playing Reaper.  

My mains are healers and tanks, specifically, Mercy, Lucio, Zenyatta, Dva, and Reinhardt.  Winston on Control maps or to counter pesky Genjis too.  I've gotten a lot better at Winston despite used to thinking I suck with him.  Apparently, he's one of my mains and I never knew.  Same with Zenyatta who I used to dread picking cause he's "not a real healer" but people seem to have gotten over it.  Rein....I still kinda suck at (some....times?) but I know it's decision making I need to work on.  I can "play" him fine, it's just knowing when to charge versus holding up shield for allies.  I'm a pretty damn conservative Rein.  I don't charge very much.  Is that a good thing or a bad thing?  I....dunno.

He's like a German super soldier......wait.

As for the other tanks, I can't aim Roadhogs hook to save my life, and Zarya is hard to play still.  I suck at timing Zarya's shields on allies and even if I get a good charge on the gun, I find a way to die JUST THEN.  And there's Dva......

4.  Dva is an Enigma

Dva is one of my most played heroes in comp and I'm not great at her or I am great at her I dunno wanna fight about it?

I don't really know.  I get a lot of medals with her, but so do some awful Dva's I've played with so.....ehhhhhhhh.

Y U B Sassin?

Here are some general thoughts about Dva.

1. Even with the matrix buff Dva is only a tank-lite.  Fine as a 2nd tank, probably gonna lose if she is the only tank (hence me desperately trying to get better at Reinhardt).
2. She is still much stronger at driving, flanking, fucking up snipers, and overall crowd control as long as her back isn't vulnerable.  
3. Her ult, even with the buff, is still best at clearing people off a point OR stopping them from rushing a point for overtime.  
4. I need to be better at "situational awareness" (that's a term right?).  I don't use her jets to bolt out of danger as often now that the matrix is better.  I need to get back to doing that.  
5. Weirdly, I tend to be better as Aggro-Dva, but as a "tank", I feel wrong for doing so.  This is probably my biggest hangup.  If Dva is 2nd tank, which is usually when I play her unless I'm being an idiot, I need to let go of "always being on point".  If the main tank dies, then go rush back in and try to stay alive until they return.  I know if I abandon my tank duties I'll get some salt though.  Even if it means wins.  

Dva is a weird tank and just weird overall.  I like characters with weird skill sets (see mei bae) so that's why I play her so much.  I'm sort of successful with her....sometimes.  Here is some stats.  

1. 2nd most comp play time (Lucio is first and has a two hour lead)
2. 45% win percentage (My highest is fucking Reinhardt lol)
3. Highest Kill Streak at 16 (Winston is 2nd with 15).
4. 36 medals in 13 games.  17 of which are gold.  

That winning percentage was much lower but at it gets closer to 50% I feel like I'm okay with her. Probably not a great Dva, but strong enough and a good choice if I don't want to play never ending support in comp.  Still though, those medals are a lie.

OH OK.  The sass again?  Fine.  FINE.  I'll just....that hurts you know?

5.  And Some Other Stats

Random stats that don't fit anywhere else.

1. Most healing done in a comp match?  21,229 as Lucio.  That must have been a Control Map that went 5 rounds.  
2. I have almost double the number of wins with Lucio (12) than my second highest hero with Zenyatta (7).  Mercy and Dva are tied at 6.
3. I played 1 game as Reaper....and he has my highest multi-kill at 4.  
4. When?!?!  When did I ever play Mei 5 matches in comp?  I have no memory of this.  Was I drunk?

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All in all, it was a good first season.  I'm glad Blizzard is scrapping Sudden Death because it's garbage.  The new rank system sounds interesting and might feel better, but I don't really know until I've had some time with it.  The PTR projectile buff is going to make me hate Hanzo more than I already do (Fuck Hanzo.  I know arrows "arc" but good Hanzo's always get impossible behind cover headshots and fuck this asshole).  The Genji nerf is whatever.  I see the really annoying Genji players just....still killing it afterwards.  The Mercy buff is unreal.  Un-fucking-real.  She's going to be more mandatory than she already was.  Also, it's going to be hard staying alive as her as EVERY-FUCKING-ONE will be gunning for you.  The balance tweaks will continue.....

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And seriously, what is the range on Roadhog's goddamn hook?  I try a long distance one and ALWAYS miss but if an enemy does it, I'm dead.  Like, on Nepal, with the pit?  Yeah?  That range shouldn't be but some-fucking-how it be.  I try to do it, and it doesn't reach EVERY TIME.....

....I swear I'm not salty.  

Overwatch Review

So Overwatch is fun.  In fact, I'm likely to write about it more often, but here is a general review written more for people who haven't played than ones who have, but ones who have might see some hot takes.

Unfairly labelled a MOBA and a competitor to Battleborn (though it still is, kinda, that second thing), Overwatch is a Team Fortress rip off with a larger, more dynamic, character set.  The game is heavily, HEAVILY, geared toward team play thus getting it's "MOBA-lite" comparison despite being an arena shooter.  It's also very easy to pick up and play, so newbies shouldn't feel left behind, while also having plenty of depth and strategy.  You can sink hours into this game and still find new things.

Overwatch is about a bunch of heroes who used to be on a team called, well, "Overwatch", but after establishing world peace....or something....they've been called back into action.....for.....reasons.  I don't know.  Any lore or anything resembling a story is not in the game.  Sure, there is a ton of supplemental content like cool Youtube videos and wikis and whatever.  None of it is actually in the game and it's all very disconnected.  I'm not sure why the characters are doing......anything really.*

*There SEEMS to be some call to get Overwatch back together....for reasons....but there has been several falling outs....for reasons.  I only get this sense from scripted, pre-game banter.  I could be way off.

The team is led by a gorilla scientist.  A sentence I get to write.

So it's weird to say this next part but, the characters are BY FAR the biggest strength of the game.  They each have well established personalities, even if they are a bit archetypal (looking at you edgelord Reaper), and their designs just ooze more personality leading Overwatch to be one of the highest searched porn categories.*  Their skill sets also add to fleshing out their personalities as well making up for the total lack of "character motivation" a good character normally needs.  The pre-game banter, and unlockable voice lines and emotes, all help as well.

*I wouldn't know....or anything.**

**Yes, yes, I know.  Rule 34 and all that.  Still, Overwatch porn flooded the internet exceptionally fast.  I'm not the only one who has noticed (link is sorta NSFW, with censoring. Use caution).   It's a testament to great characters when everyone can't wait to see them fuck.  I'm not kidding.

That's the face of someone watching porn of themselves.

The characters are split into four classes: Attack, Defense, Tank, and Support.  Attack characters are good damage dealers, tend to be more mobile, and two of them are OP with the right person (Genji and McCree).  Defense characters are slower, usually have higher HP, two are turret types, two are harassing types, and two are snipers who can go fuck themselves.  Support characters heal, well 3 of the 4 of them heal, one only does shields and can set up low power but crafty turrets.  It's uh, it's weird.....Anyway.  One has a speed boost and another can debuff enemies.  Also, Mercy is almost identical to the Team Fortress Medic so an easy newbie character.

The tank class is strange.  Out of 5 characters, only two seem like true tanks IMO, Reinhardt and Roadhog.  Winston is best at disrupting lines and causing chaos, Zarya is like a Tank/Support hybrid who has a big learning curve, and D.va.  D.va might be the biggest discussion topic among tanks because she isn't a tank.  She's great at flanking, holding lines, and a super great sniper counter which I almost don't want to say because so few know this and it's like a secret with my buds.  The tank class is always a discussion among Overwatch fans so far and I will go into more detail in a future post.

The game is set up with 12 maps on 3.5 modes.  There are Assualt maps, Escort Maps, Control (king of the hill) maps, and hybrid maps hence the 0.5.  Assualt has you capture two points by standing in a box.  Escort makes you escort a payload....just like Team Fortress....huh.  Control is yep.  And, Hybrid maps have an assualt point to take first, then a payload to escort.  Except for the Control maps, you play either attack or defense and after a round, switch.  The faster an objective is captured, the more time you have to capture the next.  Overwatch also has a (sometimes shakey) Overtime system that as long as somebody is "on the point", you can stop the opposing team from, or on attack claim, an objective (it sounds more complicated than I can explain).

The maps are surprisingly better than I initially thought in the beta, as well as during my first, I dunno, 20 levels.  There are far more hidden hallways and possibilities for flanking than at first glance.  Gaining character knowledge also helps exploit the maps in character specific ways. They also having varying locales like Russian factories, old western roads, ancient Egyptian temples, a....a quiet Latin American town.

What to the people who live here think of all this?

Now....I know I ripped Star Wars:Battlefront for having few maps and recycled modes.  Why is it okay for Overwatch and not Battlefront?  A quick 3 points.

1. Overwatch is built for team play.  Battlefront is not.  Battlefront has 20 players on each team in its largest modes, making team play near impossible.  
2. Battlefront has no classes or any real different characters.  Sure, you can play as a Jedi, sometimes.  But it's basically random with 20 people, making any sort of strategy around a Jedi  player like trying to convince the very likely 12 year old Darth Vader to wait for help rushing the next pointtttt "where the fuck are you going kid?  No!  Stop!  *Dies*".  Yes you can get new guns and equipment too but the vast majority of it is either worthless or overpowered so everybody just uses the handful that's overpowered.  Overwatch actually takes balance into consideration.
3. They are two different genres, technically.  Battlefront is a big, raucous, brainless, soulless, grotesque movie tie in that was rushed out the door.  Overwatch is about Overwatch.  Battlefront is about getting you more hyped for Star Wars movies, as if they needed it.  (Lets just say, Battlefront feeeeels more corporate.  EA does that).

It's so glossy

Overwatch has a leveling system that doesn't really mean anything other than "this dude played the game a lot....maybe".  There is a group EXP bonus too (which I have exploited as well as some others probably reading this, *high five*) but it's pretty negligible.  I've noticed the level 25-50 players tend to be the saltiest, self proclaimed experts of Overwatch.....

Yep, I love this game, but there are some negatives.

The vast majority of the community is fine.  Most people are quiet, which can hurt a team based game although sometimes things gel anyway.  The synergy is sometimes just right even on a totally silent team.  But other times, the synergy is wayyyyy off and everybody tries to do their own thing and get slaughtered.  This leads to some people....getting a sense of "know-it-all" when they clearly do not.  (Two snipers never, ever, ever works.....except like twice.  But usually, it's a shit show).  The community is slowly getting more salty (even myself at times) over bad character picks, people refusing to get on point when it's desperately needed (looking at you "always picks Hanzo player"), and Mei haters who can fuck RIGHT OFF.

Mei is bae.  I'm sorry Mei is the least "Call of Duty" of any character, and good Mei's need to spam ice walls, but you HAVE to forgive the occasional bad ice wall.  Sorry you're a fucking Genji on a defensive team fucking around in bum fuck Egypt while the rest of us hold this point and my ice wall stopped you from backing out of danger.  Maybe not spawn camp?????  I use ice walls to keep enemies from advancing on the point, block snipers, block turrets, and just general slowing them down.  Also, sorry I blocked your shot, friendly sniper or turret.  I'm sure THAT was the kill that would have solidified the win.    Mei is fucking bae!

I've always liked characters with ice powers.  Also, adorbs.  

Whoa....Got a little off topic there.

Overwatch is VERY popular so of course there are going to be some asshats.  That said, you don't have an RPG-like skill tree you need to climb in a single game.  The legendarily toxic League of Legends type of community is unlikely to develop here.  There is no "one way" to play a character.  The saltlords are routinely outnumbered.  There needs to be a punishment for rage-quitters (there used to be an exp penalty but I think it's gone.  Even then, that is a lame punishment) but I think the bad teammates are easily ignored and/or muted.

The saltiest of issues are character picks but Overwatch ENCOURAGES switching characters mid game if things are going south.  It's something, myself included, people need to get better at.  Each character has counter characters and it is admittedly hard to ditch a character I have a good K/D with.  It's obviously my teammates fault we are losing....right?

Learn as many as you can.  Sticking to one character only will lead to some bad times.

Overwatch's rewards could be better too.  You get a "Loot Box" every level, which are randomized skins, emotes, voice lines, sprays, etc.  You rarely get anything you want, you can get dupilcates (?!?!) which are converted to in game currency, and just generally suck.  Oh, also microtransactions.*  As if loot boxes don't suck enough, you can buy them for real world money.  The actual things you want?  You can't buy (I'd still hate them here but less so).  If there was an option to just get in game currency instead of randomized loot boxes, this would be 10x better.

*BTW, I don't do # outta 10 ratings in my reviews but the mere existence of microtransactions would drop this game a full point for me.  We are not harsh enough on game companies pulling this bullshit.  No, "It's just the way it is now" for me.  No.  It doesn't have to be.  Leave that to shitty mobile games.  And yeah, "only on cosmetics" is still a load a shit.  It's...in the game.  What am I paying for?

Luckily, this game isn't "pay-to-win" and it's mostly well balanced.  Some character issues aside (see next Overwatch post), the game is very welcoming to every skill type.  Hell, after practice, I'm starting to get better at my bad characters.  Except Hanzo because fuck him.

There is ALWAYS a Hanzo.  

Finally, I absolutely need to mention that Kill/Death ratio is pretty pointless in this game.  As long as you contribute to the team, it's all good. Timing can matter, sure, but overall K/D is devalued.  You cannot see teammates K/D.  Ever.  Also, some games, you just gotta throw yourself at the objective, death count be damned.  Sometimes you need to throw caution to the wind.  If a defensive team is holding a choke point, go Tracer or Reaper, get behind them, force them to defend the objective instead.  Sometimes you gotta fly in as a Mercy and revive a bunch of dead teammates knowing you are gonna die in the process.  Sometimes you gotta cover flanks as Symmetra and just sorta be in the background.  Sometimes you gotta be Genji or Tracer on defense and just be a general fuckwad that tries to disrupt an offensive back line, have a GREAT K/D but be a huge reason the team lost because of the aforementioned fuckwadded-ness

Mostly though, Overwatch is just fun as hell.  If you got the game on PC, hit me up and we can play together.  If PC is not viable, give the game a shot on console (which felt more K/D orientated but I bet is getting better), or not and miss out.  I got sold on this game by watching Youtube let's plays (mainly Jesse Cox's, who I don't even watch all that much).  There is more in depth stuff I could say about the characters and strategy....so expect that post some time.

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Mei is bae.  Some of you, fucking hate Mei.  Just want you to know.  You are very, very, wrong.  You came across a good one, and suck at Mei yourself.  I understand.  Mei is unorthodox to play as and good Mei's are a problem.  You're just jealous.  Let it go....snow and ice reference unintentional.

Overwatch Beta Impressions (maybe slightly NSFW image used).

I'm not a big fan of multiplayer only games and I'm one who typically doesn't like moba's, but even I couldn't resist the allure of Overwatch.  It took maybe a dozen Let's Play videos from people in the closed beta to make me want to check out the open beta.  And yeah, yeah, it's fun as hell.

I think it helps that Overwatch isn't really a moba but an arena shooter. Basically a Team Fortress sort of ripoff with light moba elements in its characters.  Every character seems to have a counter, balance is mostly okay, and abilities can often have unique powers against other characters.  The maps are varied enough to have a "capture the two points" maps, best of 3 capture and hold a single point maps, and escort the payload maps that usually have a point to capture first but not always.  I'd get sick of playing the same three lanes, towers, minions, thing many other actual mobas are designed as.  Plus, this game is a weird mix of hardcore and casual enough that it's easy not to take it too seriously.  I think Blizzard could have a real gem here and it will likely be my go-to multiplayer game for a long time.

I'd like to give you my impressions on some of the characters.  I at least tried every character over the roughly 25-30 hours I played, but many not enough to give a good opinion on.  So here is the top, ehhhh, 8 I played in ascending order.

Portal 3 looks hardcore.

8. Zarya - Yeah.  I'm surprised too.  I saw hardly anybody play her and probably for good reason.  I don't get this character.  She's basically a support tank, while also being kinda squishy for a tank.  Her particle beam isn't very long so she has to get in peoples faces.  It can get powered up with her barriers taking damage though.  You can give yourself and your teammates barriers....but they last roughly 2 seconds.  So, you basically need to predict when your teammates will leave cover AND when they might take damage, making this character incredibly hard to learn.  I never saw a really good Zarya, but down the road, if somebody really does learn her, they would be unstoppable.  Also, her Ult is a black hole that doesn't do damage but a coordinated team could really make some plays.  Think Zarya ult and McCree/Pharrah ult....good god.

Is she part robot or...?

7. Mercy - She's basically the Medic from Team Fortress only with a flight ability that usually gets me killed.  She can also boost a teammates attack but as soon as they start taking damage I immediately switch to heals.  Many have tried a Team Fortress style tandem of Medic and Heavy, but I haven't really found a great one.  Also, her ult can singlehandedly change the course of a game if she can resurrect several teammates that die at once.

Loudest damn gun in the game

6. Torbjorn - I had my best kill streak with this character at 26 despite not doing much work because turret.  I think I know the game I got this on too.  It was Route 66 and the opposing team decided to go with 6 Tracers (lolwut).  They eventually destroyed that turret, but I set up another one on the top of the ramp by the payload and....just threw out armor the rest of the match because they never destroyed that 2nd turret.  I barely had to fix it.  Also, his ult gives him and his turret super strength and it's a tad overpowered.

Yeah.  This death machine is so peaceful.

5. Bastion - Uh....more on him in a bit.

Dat smirk tho

4. Symmetra - I love this character.  You can get creative with her and her six sentry turrets.  There really isn't a stealth character in this game (Reaper sorta) and you know how I love me some stealth.  This character lets me be creative without the stealth.  I usually hang back with this character and let the sentry turrets do most of the work.  Symmetra can't really carry a team though so others need to do the heavy lifting.  Still though, I had the highest win percentage with her.  Her teleporter is soooooo nice for those long runs back too.

She's so sassy and I love it.

3. Dva - For a mech, it sure does explode easily.  Luckily you can run around and shoot a decently powered pistol afterwards...but you have no other abilities while in this mode.  At least she is fast.  Dva is the only tank I'm decent at and I had my 2nd best kill streak with her at 15.  I hate how she can barely move while shooting in mech form but, whatever.  On the last day of the beta, I learned how to use her better with the shield and her flight that lets her short range guns do far more damage.  Plus, her ult is RI-DIC-U-LOUS.  Seeing opposing players panic while looking for cover is fun though.

I don't see the big deal about her forearm thingies.

2. Tracer - Tracer is a lot of fun butt I suck at her.  I've lost the most games as her and die A LOT.  And, I've blinked off the side of a cliff.....several times.  That said, I tend to play her as a harasser.  If teams start chasing, oh man, it's on.  I never get many kills as her butt I can be twitchy and get teams to focus on me while the rest of my team captures the point.  Those are the good matches.  If they stick to their ground, then I'm useless as Tracer.  Her ult is okay butt I NEVER successfully got a bomb to stick.  Why do I always fucking miss?

Bae.

1. Mei - 

You: "I hate Mei.  She's too weak except suddenly I face a good one and everything sucks."
Me: "Mei.....is.....bae."
You:  "What? No. Why is her main attack so weak? It doesn't do much damage."
Me: "Mei..........is...............bae."
You:  "What are you talking about?  Her secondary icicle attack is strong but tough to aim without a scope.  Her ult seems to go where it wants too and her ice heal is super cheap.  She's the only one that can heal and be immune to damage while she does so."
Me:  "Mei............................................is..............................bae."
You:  "Why do you keep saying that?"
Me:  "Mei is bae.  Mei is bae."
You: "....okay."
Me:  "MEI IS BAE.  MEI IS BAE."
You:  "..."
Me:  "MEIISBAEMEIISBAEMEIISBAEMEIISBAEMEIISBAEMEIISBAEMEIISBAEMEIISBAE.  #Meiisbae.
You:  *clicks on twitter hashtag*  "Oh god!"

(Yeah don't click that hashtag on twitter at work.  It is, predictably, filling with porn.)

You do you Internet.  

Mei is a hard character to learn but once you do, Mei is bae.  I'm not sure who counters her except maybe a good Tracer since Mei is a tad slow.  Her ice wall is just...bliss.  I love periodically setting up a wall on a Widowmaker or Hanzo up high just cause I can.  I hope the Widowmaker is looking through her scope too when BAM, nothing but ice.  Her freeze ray is weak in damage but can freeze enemies for a icicle shot, melee, or partner with a friendly sniper.  I had the most objective kills with her despite never getting that many kills with her....if that makes sense.  I tend to play her as a defensive harasser, hanging around the objective and spamming ice walls that sometimes block my own team from making shots but hey, my teams win when I do that often so let it go for teams sake.  The best part is her durability as a non-tank.  I may not get many kills, except when they try to take my point, but I rarely die as her too.

Wow this is getting long for an impressions write-up.  4 more points about Overwatch I want to bring up.  

1. The maps tend to favor defense in my opinion, especially Volskaya Industries where the offensive team maybe won 10% of the time.  I don't know why this is since that last point has multiple paths to attack.  Coordination is key here so playing with randoms makes this near impossible.

Hollywood is also a rare attack win.

2. Fuck Bastion.  Okay, I played him quite a bit but I've been buried by defensive teams that go 3 Bastions with one Junkrat or Symmetra that set up kills for them.  I usually switch to Roadhog so I can hook those fuckers out of their turret formation. Unfortunately, nobody else switches so I just watch a bunch of Reinhardts get their shields blown away in seconds.  Snipers and a good Pharrah can counter Bastion as well.  Maybe Genji.  Speaking of...

3. Genji seems broken but he's actually really hard to play well.  A good Genji is the worst though.  Just....the worst.  #GenjiisNOTbae

Yes. I funny with dank memes too. Blaze it 420. Let us partake in some Mountain Dew and Doritos brother.

4. Finally, I played the beta on PS4 but I'm going to get the game for PC now that I have a PC capable of running it.  I already have nightmares of relearning everything with keyboard and mouse but I'll adjust.  That said....(my PC gaming friends are going to love this part)......

The PS4 community is struggle bus.  I know it's a problem on all platforms that too many people are unwilling to change characters mid match to counter but holy hell, why was I stuck on a poorly performing attack team with 3 goddamn snipers?  Not one player changed, we all got slaughtered and I tried to desperately capture a point with time running out 1 vs 6.  1 vs 6?!?!?  I even checked and all my teammates were ALIVE for that final rush.  The fuck were you all doing?  As an experiment, I decided to stick with them for another match and, I...ahh....3 goddamn snipers again on a best of 3 map!  Yeah, great picks.  I know you all want to snipe so badly but that is basically giving the other team the win.  

"Why you here love?"

There were FARRRRR too many times when I'm attacking the point and NEVER see a teammate.  Oh, they're not dead, they are just camping somewhere in an effort to get a good K/D.....in a game that really doesn't value K/D all that much. It's more about team kills as "eliminations".  As long as you did some damage, you get a point.  You can solo kill people obviously, but it doesn't really add up to winning necessarily.

I've mentioned this before in my Battlefront review but PS4 players have a lot of people who only want to a good K/D and couldn't give less of a shit about actually winning.  I know every platform has them but it seems egregiously high recently.  I know a lot of people (dickbags) have switched to PS4 after the Xbox One announcement debacle.  It was never this bad on PS3, or, at least it didn't feel like it.

Also, the saltiness at times, my god.  The only guy on voice chat in one match decided to spend most of the match whining that none of us were a Reinhardt while he was a fucking Mercy.  If we need a Reinhardt so bad....why not YOU change?  Mercy is a good support, I like her, but don't always need her.  We were losing, I switched to Roadhog, he kept healing me, and I made a play of the game that stopped the payload inches from the destination (we were the only two alive at the time) with 2 minutes left.  The rest of the team that never changed characters and I held them off and won.  So not only was this dude salty, he was proven wrong.  And in the next match, I was on his opposing team and played a part in stopping a payload inches from it's destination again with some perfect Symmetra turrets and held out for 4 fucking minutes.  He quit out after losing.  I....almost want to know what he was saying to his team.  It would have been the saltiest of whining and we would have to declare him the new Dead Sea.

I consist of shield and hammer....and rocket engine on my....back....what?

(I....just wanted to tell that story in the last paragraph).

Anyway.  Fun game.  I assume in time, people and teams will learn to counter better and the game won't be so defensively advantageous. I look forward to getting into the swing of things again on PC and playing with some buds who are probably reading this.

But still, hey Blizzard?  Maybe think about nerfing Bastion some.  Maybe a smaller clip in turret mode and/or a longer reload.  Thanks.

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