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Saturday, November 19, 2016

In Memoriam: Tyler Despres.

To be honest, I have no idea how to start this.  I've always wanted to do a music post but not like this, not because a friend of mine passed away.  But, I have to do this.  I have too.  

I'm writing this mostly for people who never knew Tyler Despres.  I'm going to give a run down on his music with some of my personal anecdotes at the end.  I know other friends and family may come across this one day and please know that...I am not a great writer.  I am taking great respect on this post, more than any other, despite crying far more during this post than...all of them really.  This post will have more stream of consciousness stuff than ever.  That said, let me know if I get anything really wrong or I am downright offending somebody.  


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Tyler Despres was a friend of mine and he passed away recently. He was a friend to many, the funniest person I've ever known, and a fantastic musician.  He has had quite a run with the Denver music scene so I'd like to share some of that music with you in Chronological order.


Vera

I searched high and low for my very low quality Vera CD but looking for a CD I got in high school and 4 homes later is near impossible.  Unfortunately, I have no Vera songs to provide.  I'm actually questioning if it was mine or my friend Mike's.  Ah well.  

I can describe the secretly best high school rock band we had though.*  Their style was very Smashing Pumpkins, to the point where they played actual Smashing Pumpkins covers.  They even played Eye once in a church gym and the band does not remember but WE DO.  Oh yes, we do.  And it was glorious.

*The most popular high school band was a pop-punk band called Average.  They were average.

Also, Hi Jon, Matt, and Jeremiah.  

Mr Coyote/Memetics

The first time I ever drove up to Fort Collins was for Tyler's band, Mr Coyote.  Weirdly enough, I live in Fort Collins now.  I'm not sure why they played up here so often, I didn't ask, but they played at a club called the Starlight.  It's now called Hodi's and that is a super stupid name.  "Starlight" is way better.  Anyway, for those who have never been, the Starlight is a Larimer Lounge clone only with an extra room where the stairs are in Larimer Lounge.  Also it's 18 and up because of a weird FoCo law but 18-20 year old's can't leave and get back in.  So...sorta like The Marque in Denver in that regard?

Mr Coyote, later renamed as the Memetics, was two guitars (Hi Charlie), both of which provided vocals, a bass (Hi Phil) and a drummer (the Jon I mentioned earlier.  Also, Hi).  Some songs were Tyler only on vocals, some were Charlie only, and some had both.  This was a drastic step up from Vera.  This had the groundwork for a great band.  It was grungy at times and was mostly rooted in 1990's alt-rock but with some modern Indie rock sensibilities.  The most common comparison to a mainstream band would be the Toadies.  Even then, there is a lot of difference there.

What I think is remarkable now, listening to these songs for the first time in a decade, is that weird bridge between 90's alt-rock and modern indie rock, especially in the 2005-2007 songs on these demos. *

*I still can't believe I found this old Myspace page.  The last song does not appear to be working though.

The 2000's is a weird time and when I spent the ages 17-27.  My prime....and this was my soundtrack.  I went out of my way to go to Mr Coyote/Memetics shows.  I was often getting drunk and/or doing drugs and watching this band till midnight or later while also having to be at work at 3am.  The Jimi Hendrix cover at the Walnut Room is something I KNOW I was there for because it was at 2am and I had the next day off luckily.  I stayed for the end, even after the bar pulled drinks.  

As much as I love this band of Tyler's, which excluded my favorite song Pentagon because it doesn't exist on the internet (....I think?), and be disappointed when they were forced to break up, his next band would be even better.

Dualistics

My personal favorite of all his bands.  This being the more modern, you can find everything they recorded on Spotify.  My favorites are Confederate Missile, Sleight of Hand (both of which Tyler sings), Pure Sorcery, and Spy vs Spy (Charlie returns from Memetics and is lead locals on these two).  Give em a listen.

I have two great memories of this band.  One time, they graciously opened for my wife's band's CD release at Larimer Lounge despite being the much bigger band at the time.  This band of her's (this is her previous band, not the one she is in now) had a couple of snobbish assholes who thought Dualistics was just a garage band with nothing special.*  After their set, both of these snobbish assholes told me they were wrong and how right I was.   I was especially surprised by one of them because he's the type of guy who hates everything.  His favorite bands are NOBODY.

*In the off chance people read this slightly knowing my wife's old band....lets say it was R and N.  Also, RIP R.  He was another friend of mine that died this year.  Our personalities clashed hard at times but I wanted better for him than this.  You're always welcome to crash on my couch buddy.

Anyway, here is a old low audio quality video of Spy vs Spy the night of my wife's old band's CD release.  Tyler is in the middle.  Check out the Spotify version for better quality but at least here you see that legendary stage presence.


The other great memory is the time they over sold the Hi-Dive for the 25th anniversary of Kurt Cobain's death and they played In Utero in full.  Their cover of Scentless Apprentice was otherworldly.  It is one of the first times I ever saw a full mosh pit break out at the Hi-Dive.  I got roughly 3 beers thrown on me as I was close to the front and I LOVED IT.  It was one of those shows that you step outside into the cool night air for a cigarette drenched in sweat, beer, and possibly somebody elses vomit and feel great!  In any other circumstance, you're leaving a crime scene.  The only crime scene I left that night was the fact that it was criminal that I would never see a night like that again.

The Dualistics old Youtube page has a bunch of "behind the scenes" footage.  I particularly like this part of episode 5 that features Tyler singing, Tyler fucking around with a broken guitar, and his excellent humor on the piano.

Also.....they played Red Rocks.  Yes, fucking Red Rocks.  Okay they opened for the Flobots but still.  Unfortunately every video is just a clip but here is a little taste.  Tyler is on the right in the red or orange shirt (the lighting is weird).


And one more at the Gothic Theater.  Good quality audio too.



Science Partner

While Dualistics ended because life got in the way (but not totally as they played shows when they could), Tyler's next project was a different feel while also feeling very Tyler.  Science Partner was more willing to go mellow at times, sometimes more poppy, more singer-songwritey (that's not a word), and more injected with humor.  Think Ben Folds meets Indie Rock meets Queens of the Stone Age meets dare I say, Belle Sebastian.  The band was sometimes half of Dualistics, sometimes not. This band included many full band versions of Tyler's solo work.....I think (oh god.  I don't really know feel free to correct me).

Unfortunately, life got in the way and I was unable to follow Science Partner as well as previous bands.  That said, I still love it.

So of course, I'm including this first as I was ACTUALLY AT THIS at UMS 3 years ago.  The audio quality is iffy but hey.


For a clean studio version of that song, I got ya.  

Science Partner was on Open Air too.....wait, WHAT?  


(I know they were on Open Air but still that's nutso).  

For those reading who didn't know him, it's debatable if Dualistics or Science Partner was the "bigger" band.  It's dumb to even bring up.  I love them both.  

Gin Doctors

While Science Partner was never officially over (life getting in the way and such), Tyler's last main band was the Gin Doctors, a play on 90's bands the Gin Blossoms and the Spin Doctors.  This band was different in that it had no original songs.  It was a 90's cover band and a fantastic one.  It ironically (not the right word) made more money than any of his previous bands because the music industry is stupid. 

Other than the obvious two bands the name of THIS band name drops, you can name any other popular 90's band and they probably played it.  Green Day?  They played Dookie in it's entirety for one show.  Pearl Jam?  Same.  Another full album.  Hell they played NON-bands like Spice Girls, TLC, and Backstreet Boys...only rock-ified.  

So here they are playing Say It Ain't So and I couldn't go cause my wife's new band was playing the same night at a different venue.  It's okay.  Even she is bitter about it.  

Tyler is on the far left.  Unrecognizable.

Also this happened.


And Now, A Personal Note.

I've known Tyler since High School but we were closest afterward during the Great Purge of High School Friends 2003-ish (also known as that time when people really started to move away...it happens to us all).  I'm sad that so much of that time seems cloudy in my memory but I remember Cricket on the Hill.  I remember the Starlight.  I remember a show at Herman's Hideaway (HA.  Fuck that place).  The number of times I've seen Tyler play at Larimer Lounge or the Meadowlark or the Hi-Dive I...don't know.  It's too high to count.  And....I'm so incredibly grateful and appreciative of that.  

Tyler was better than most of us.  He was better than me.  He was incredibly talented, really funny, and just the nicest person.  My wife was the only one available to help him clean his apartment above the Meadowlark and I think it's the only time she got to share with him personally and I'm sad it wasn't more.  I remember one night in that apartment getting drunk, playing Dr Mario on his NES (this is like 2007) and cutting my foot open on his death trap of a floor.  It wasn't that bad but enough to bleed so he, Tyler, wrapped my foot up with toilet paper.  I stuck a sock over it, put my shoes back on, and my wife never knew (HI BABY).  That's just one of many, many, moments.  

And now, after his passing, I'm stuck remembering a regret that shouldn't be.  I had a co-workers birthday party to go too and while driving to it, Tyler called me to go to laser tag (?!?) with him.  I didn't go even though I wanted too because I felt like the co-worker wouldn't have anybody at his birthday.  This...ended up being true.  I was the only one at the birthday party.  This guy and I shared a 40oz of Olde English.  I left early.  I know I did a good thing but I can't help but wonder, "what if".  It stings now even though I know I did a "good person" thing and that bothers me.  Maybe I'm not a good person?  Why do I feel bad about this?

What is really memorable about that is how bummed Tyler was that I said I couldn't go.  I had never heard him be disappointed about something like that while also understanding so unbelievably hard.  It sticks with me.  It's not the best memory, while also not really being bad, but it is poignant.  Its weird how a friend can be so understanding and disappointed at the same time.  That...is just the person Tyler was.  

At his life celebration, at Larimer Lounge of course, I saw people from high school I haven't seen in ten years.  We exchanged phone numbers and it was fantastic to see them all again.  It's unfortunate it was under such circumstances but there was so much genuine love among old friends.  There was a lot of "picking up where we left off" in talking and comforting and it was really nice.  People gave speeches, including members from Memetics and Dualistics.  Musicians played, Science Partner played and Gin Doctors played.  Gin Doctors actually ended with their usual ending song, Dreams by The Cranberries.  I sang along with all the ohhhh ohhhh ohhh's as loud as I could with tears running down my face.  I will remember that too.  

But what really got me is later that night, I went to see another show and the band, The Ned Garth Explosion, ended a song and did a shout out to Tyler.  A large amount of the crowd cheered in a...surprising way.  Like they knew (It was a lot).  And it hit hard.  It hit hard.  Larimer Lounge had hundreds of people there and here in another venue hours later on the other side of town, people knew.  After that show, I thanked Ned Garth, then off hand mentioned I knew him since High School, and he jumped over his merchandise table and hugged me.  And....I cried into a strangers shoulder.  And he let me.  I gained my composure after about 10 seconds and pulled back but he still had his arms around me and wow.  Tyler is fucking magic.  Ned said, "I'm so sorry and I will miss him too" and I spent the rest of the night texting my friends at Tyler's life celebration that I loved them and it needed to be said.  Because it's true. 

I'm lucky to have known him and I'm grateful for all the other people I know either because of him or because he brought us together.  It's rare to see somebody so well loved by so many and has brought a much needed sense of hope in a godawful 2016.  Look at this love that has been helpfully cultivated by Tyler.  We all need that.  I needed that.  And the one good thing about his passing, is his one hell of a legacy left on us that knew him.  

I leave this tribute to Tyler Despres with this Science Partner song.  It's beautiful, and it wouldn't be just perfect without some humor at the end.  Love ya Tyler.  I'll miss you.  


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For posterity, contact me on Twitter preferably if I got something egregiously wrong.  I am working mostly off memory.  

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